Les Politiques et Les Femmes

"I'm concerned for you," said Piotr, my new Polish friend.
"Why?" I asked surprised by the sudden change of subject.
"Well, I think politics will make you cynical."
"No," I began, "it's very serious stuff, yes, but I don't allow it to bring me down."
"Well," he continued, "politics is really for men."
I stand quietly for a moment, allowing a stunned and uncertain smile to my face. Mon dieu! He is serious.
"In the U.S., Piotr," I replied stiffly, "women do whatever they want."

My experiences here, I must say, has less to do with the French. I know a great deal about teachers, beauracracy, and commerce, but very little about social interactions. I only have two real French friends. However, I am learning a great deal about other nationalities because I meet primarily international students. It's been interesting meeting students that do not come from the same sex/gender culture of the U.S., especially when it comes to politics. The conversation above is a perfect example. I sometimes forget how much more liberty there is for women in the U.S. than in most places of the world. I have to explain that one of the great values of the book Pride and Prejudice is not simply the story, but the presentation of an intelligent female herione. In romance, men find Cassidy and I to be less attractive because we are so bold. Women should be shy. They should act disinterested. And most importantly, they should not engage in political debates, period.

I remembered studying in class that the U.S. was different with regard to women and politics, so I did a little research (http://www.un.org/womenwatch/daw/public/percent.htm). I some ways it's true, with the U.S. ranking first with total percentage of women in government positions: 33.1%. Here may be a few surprises:

Belgium: 6.6%
France: 10.8%
Germany: 6.1%
Italy: 7.1%
Switzerland: 7.1%
U.K.: 6.9%

Even Canada only has 17.7%... That almost half as many women in government as the U.S.

But, the situation gets a little skewed when you look at how many women are in ministerial or parliamentary positions (http://www.ipu.org/wmn-e/classif.htm). Then the U.S. drops to 67th. Ouch. Bosnia has a higher percentage of women in their parliament than we do. Every other developed nation except for France and Ireland is above us on the list. Only 15% of the House of Reps is female, and 14% of the Senate is women. Seriously, Americans, we can do better.

I hardly know what to do with these statistics though, because you know who's number 1? Rwanda. Yeah, I think we woman might vote "Nay" on making Rwanda the posterchild for feminine capacity.

Anyway, it's interesting to study this. Mostly what I learned in this whole situation is that there are still places where woman are for some reason or another not supposed to go. And, naturally, I'm going there.

Thoughts that Come Faster than the Stars in Hyperspace

I’ve been struggling the past few days to begin to grasp the speed at which I am learning. Moments of gross significance come and leave, only to be immediately followed by another. Something is said, my mind processes it, and I am forever changed. At first I hardly even noticed they were there, but now I am so aware of them that I feel intimidated. When I first arrived in Clermont-Ferrand, I felt that I was dropped off into a city where time has stopped. Now I feel I lack the time to simply process the weight of the events around me. From international politics, to art, to religion, to my feeling of personal significance, to literature, to music, to everything, I am lost in this new world of ideas.

When I graduated from high school, I remember the burden I felt entering college. It wasn’t simply a matter of obtaining a degree. I had been home schooled my whole life. It was my first test of many. I remember the skeptical, and subtly condescending, questions about my ability to handle a real classroom. Could the home schooler really handle the social pressures, the academic structures, and separation from her family? I felt this need to not simply perform well, but to perform excellently. Maybe even to perform perfectly. I managed it. Bumps came, but I navigated them with strength that’s expected from every other young American adult.

There is a key there, though. American. I achieved such heights because I was raised for American culture. This may seem silly on the surface, but I think those home schoolers who do fail fail because of the fact they were not raised to live in our culture. Well, I was. I know how to communicate with my peers. I know how to communicate with authority figures. I know how to communicate differently with a professor or a police officer or a boss. I know how to identify good fashion from bad. Cool from unpopular. Funny from inappropriate. Right from wrong.

Now I feel like I graduated from high school again. But home schooling is not the source of skepticism, rather my nationality is. Americans and their money. Americans and their need for order. Americans and their ignorance of other languages. Americans and their ignorance of everything un-American. Again, I feel the need to prove myself. To perform not just well, but excellently… perfectly. But in college, I knew my goals: get A’s, get cool/smart friends, keep a job, impress the professors, maybe take a boyfriend who is smart and cute, etc. Here, though, the goals are lost to me.

My Polish friend walked into my room the other day, and complemented me on the messiness of my room. I thought he was joking, but he replied, “No, it has a lovely European chaos to it.” He makes fun of Americans and our worries about money, and our dedication to practicality. Efficiency and order, he believes, takes away from the flavor of life. It would be so easy to dismiss him. Efficiency and order gives Americans the time and freedom to enjoy to flavors of life. What does he know? He’s never been to the U.S.! But unorthodoxy runs in my blood. Just because I know one way doesn’t mean there is another way. And, I must learn this other way before I can know which one is the best. But how do I knowingly abandon order?

Grades here are important, but I am hardly expected to perform well. I am one of the worst students in my class. Oh, I know my French grammaire backwards and forwards, but I can hardly speak or understand French. I am constantly making stupid mistakes in class. Yesterday a girl was giving a speech and she asked a question. I thought she was asking to the other students to answer, so I responded, in my best French. Everyone starred at me awkwardly before the girl said, “La question n’est pas pour toi.” Of course. She was listing the question she was going to ask French people for her exposé. I just can’t understand French. Fortunately I felt some need to talk, so I made sure everyone else in the class understood that too. Isn’t great to make all of your peers aware of your failings? I have become a child again. I am unable to communicate, making the simplest mistakes, but I lack a parent. Instead, I have the lingering values and ego of an intelligent woman who used to attend a university in Oklahoma. I am left only to long again for the time when I am respected by others and self-assured.

Lessons Learn From Real French People.

On Saturday night, I went out with our new French friend and her boyfriend. He is in a band called “Cocoon.” (You can find out more about this band at www.myspace.com/listentococoon) Cassidy and I were surprised to learn that he writes all his music in English, and we asked him why. He said that English is more beautiful and melodic than French. I quickly explained that in the U.S., there is this notion that English sounds boxy, while French sounds romantic and beautiful. But then they both explained that there are tone changes even in regular conversation in English that are not in French. Our voices go up and down depending on the context of what we are saying. It never occurred to me, but French is much more monotonous than English. I love my own language more and more every day.

However, the most popular topic of discussion when we meet new people is obesity. If the people have been to America, they understand how fattening our food is, and also understand how good it is. So, they understand how Americans get so fat, but they are sort of mystified why we don’t simply eat healthier. I have had two people who talked about how sick they got when they moved to the U.S. because they were not used to so much fat in their diet. Being here makes me all the more determined to be healthy when I move back to the states. It is harder, but I think I can do it. Unfortunately, for the time being, I am having difficulty maintaining my weight here, because there is nothing to do in the evenings and the weekends other than eat. Oh well, I'll figure it out eventually.

Est-elle encore vivante?

Okay, so I got sick... AGAIN! I had a fever for over 8 days straight! It was a bad relapse from my cold when I got here, only to made worse by the French medical system. It's a pretty groovy deal here with medicine, but a doctor is a doctor, whether here or in the States. And God knows I have bad luck with them. I went to the doctor, and she gave me medicine that made me worse. Then I went to the emergency room, and they gave me medicine that I was allergic to before they gave me medicine that made me throw up every other hour. Ultimately, I think enough time passed that the stupid sickness passed on its own.

I started a group on Facebook called, "Don't blame the French. They didn't take us to war with Iraq." It's been an interesting study in French/American relations. Some Americans were concerned that I was anti-American, though they supported the concept of not judging the French. Some French were quick to point out their own failures. Other Americans just left messages of hate. It also spawned a debate about the legacy of Clinton's impeachment. I listed it as one of the absurdities of American society since the end of World War II that Americans should think about before talking about how awful the French are. That has spurred more discussion than the French themselves.

I was supposed to start classes last week, but the doctor suggested that I "se reposer." So, I will start classes Monday. I am a little nervous. I have never in my life had so much class in one subject. I'm afraid I'm going to be mind-numbing bored, especially with how much French I'm having to speak already on a daily basis. I'm also having a hard time justifying in my mind why I'm even studying French. I mean, I am in France, but everyone speaks English. I am learning a great deal about living outside of American culture, but at the same time not that much. I went out last night, and it was all Irish, American, and British people. There were a couple of people from South America, a German, and a French girl. And only the people from South America couldn't speak English well. I'm just investing a lot into the goal of speaking French without any apparent return to that investment. I'm just hoping the benefits will reveal themselves in the process.

If all else fails, I'm seeing Sufjan Stevens, and I am living in Europe. I'm vacationing in Italy in December, I'll be spending a weekend in the Alps in the Spring, and I'll be meeting up with one of my dearest friends in Spain, England, or Germany. Life isn't that bad. I just wish I could get these people to understand the concept of toilet seats. And ranch dressing. And mexican food. And... what am I talking about? America is way cooler.

Actually, I am getting used to my pseudo-celebrity status here. So many people will stop our little group of Oklahomans on the street when they hear us speaking English, because they want to practice so badly. Then they hear we're from the U.S., and their eyes light up like we just told them we were movie stars or something. They want to know what it's like and so on. Now the people who've actually gone are a little less impressed, but even they understand that American food is pretty amazing. But it does make life a little more bearable when others are snooty with us. We just remember that our language (and maybe even our culture) is cooler than their's.

Now, if we could just fix some of our foreign policy glitches, we might be able to gloat a little more...